It kills me to feel this way.

For the first time, I don't quite know... how to say how I feel.

What matters most of all?

I want to be enough.

I'm not as strong as I lead myself to believe. And that... that scares me more than anything.

I have so much emotion going on inside of me right now and I just don't know what to do it. It's all mixed and jumbled and I want to keep it that way... once I put one emotion above the rest, I'm scared of what it can potentially do to me. I hate over-analyzing... I mean doesn't everyone? But it makes you think and do unfair things to undeserving people. I don't even know if half the things I'm saying right now makes as much sense as it does in my own thoughts... I just want everything to come into place.